Lessons for a Werewolf Warrior Read online

  Only one thing can stop my scheme,

  My ice cream ever after dream.

  Only a dashing true Hero,

  Can turn my plans into zero.

  And so you see I really must,

  Turn all bystanders into dust,

  So no Hero will ever know,

  What took place here among the snow …

  ‘Hurry!’ it hissed at the Zurm.

  The sooner you strawberry-jam

  The sooner you and I can scram!

  ‘Gluuurrrk!’ The giant Zurm began to ooze out the door.

  ‘No!’ croaked Boo again. He had to do something!

  But what? He couldn’t use his jaws to bite. He couldn’t even give a proper howl to call for help or warn everyone to get away.

  He glanced over at Mum. But she was as unmoving as the Bigpaws. Only her big brown eyes gazed at him helplessly.

  We need a Hero! he thought. That’s how you got a Hero when things went bad — you put out a howl for a Hero!

  But there were no Heroes in the ice-cream shop. There was no Hero in all of Sleepy Whiskers.

  Except for you, said a whisper in Boo’s mind. YOU have to save the town now.

  But I can’t, thought Boo. I’m not a Hero! He looked frantically at Mum. Mum could deal with everything! Curdled ice cream, rat fights in the larder.

  But even Mum couldn’t help them now.

  Move, said the whisper in his mind. YOU help them, Boo. MOVE.

  Behind him he could hear a long soft sluuuushhh as the Zurm oozed down the stairs. A vision of what would happen hovered in front of him … Spot, glued to the floor, her Frisbee in her mouth, her eyes wide and desperate as she slowly starved. Old Ms Shaggy, strawberry-jammed solid as she spooned out ice cream for her nephews …

  The ice cream, thought Boo frantically. The Greedle wants our ice cream!

  And suddenly he knew what he could do.

  3

  An Unexpected Hero

  His jaws were too gummed up to move more than a whisker. His paws were stuck to the floor. Even his tail was glued solid.

  But one thing could still move.

  Maybe.

  ‘Stop.’ Boo tried to make the word sound as bold as he could. But he still sounded like a squeaky puppy toy.

  The Greedle glanced back at him. Its tiny arms held the vat of ice cream lovingly. ‘Stop?’ it enquired. ‘Now you know, you can’t just say “stop”. The correct thing to say is “Stop, or I’ll” …’ It giggled. One small hand stroked the ice-cream vat.

  But you see it’s really true,

  There is nothing you can do.

  ‘Yes there is,’ croaked Boo. ‘Call off your worm! Just take the ice cream and go away. Or else I’ll …’

  ‘Or else you’ll what?’ smiled the Greedle.

  ‘This!’ squeaked Boo, hoping desperately that he could manage what he planned to do. He couldn’t lift his leg more than a few centimetres. But maybe … maybe …

  Boo took aim.

  Yes, he could!

  ‘Nooooooo!’ It was impossible that so small a creature could groan so loudly. The Greedle stared at the yellow drop slowly melting a hole in the ice cream. ‘The Best Ice Cream in the Universes!’ it shrieked. ‘You’ve polluted it!’

  ‘And there’s more where that came from!’

  Boo hoped desperately that he was right. That drop had taken all his strength. If only he hadn’t widdled on Ms Shaggy’s gatepost he might have had more pressure! But it was too late for regrets now.

  The Greedle stared at him in horror. Mum and the Bigpaws gazed at him too, with growing hope in their eyes.

  ‘Call back your Zurm or I’ll squirt the biggest puddle you ever saw! It’ll be Frozen Widdle Ice Cream! You don’t want to eat Widdle Ice Cream, do you?’

  The Greedle’s tiny eyes were bright and unwinking. ‘Oh, I have no time for puppy foolishness!’ it screeched. ‘Do you know how many creatures I control, you silly little dog? Have you any idea of my true power? Obviously not. Without that ice cream, my Christmas dinner will be ruined, you little brat! There isn’t time to make another batch.’

  The Greedle grimaced wildly, its face falling into bulges. ‘It looks like I’ll have to leave Sleepy Whiskers without destroying it. But don’t think you’re off scott free, nasty puppy! Zurm!’ The sudden yell echoed through the building.

  ‘Glurk sqlurk?’ The long slurring voice sounded as though it came from the other side of the street.

  ‘Return!’

  ‘Glurk!!’

  The slithering sound grew louder once again. The smell of strawberry jam grew stronger. Boo heard the Zurm ooze across the icy road, then up the steps, through the shop and into the kitchen.

  Boo tried not to shiver at the sight of it.

  ‘Good Zurm,’ said the Greedle gently. ‘Roaches!’ it added, in a sudden yell. ‘Come here now!’

  ‘Pick pick pick pick pick!’ Something chattered in the tiniest voice Boo had ever heard. He stared in horror as a hundred little cockroaches scuttled into the kitchen.

  ‘Take the ice cream,’ ordered the Greedle.

  The leader of the Roaches gazed up at the Greedle adoringly. ‘Pick pick pick pick pick pick pick pick??!’ it chirruped.

  The Greedle smiled. ‘Very well,’ it said indulgently.

  ‘Just one little bite of wolf.

  Because it’s Christmas.

  Just one taste,

  Of werewolf paste,

  Then we’ll make haste …

  ‘Aaaahhh!’ screamed Boo — it was as much of a scream as his glued-up jaws could make — as dozens of tiny fangs pierced his ankle. ‘Stop it! Leave me alone! Leave us all alone! Or I’ll widdle again!’

  ‘Enough!’ cried the Greedle sharply. ‘Off with you, Roaches! And take my precious ice cream with you!’

  Boo watched helplessly as the Roaches pulled their fangs out of his flesh. Half of them scuttled to the ice-cream vat. They surrounded it, lifting together. The vat slid out the hallway door, and vanished down the corridor.

  The Greedle waited till the vat had vanished, then nodded to the rest of the Roaches. ‘Now take the ice-cream maker. Carefully! We don’t want to bruise her.’

  ‘What! You can’t take Mum!’ Boo gazed in despair as the remaining Roaches surrounded his mum, and began to carry her down the hallway.

  ‘Mum!’ cried Boo. ‘Mum!’

  But there was no answer.

  The Greedle laughed. It was a happy sound. You would almost think it was the laughter of a whole happy family around the Christmas table — if you couldn’t see the malice in the Greedle’s small eyes, or the dripping hunger of its mouth. ‘You can’t even widdle in the ice cream now. I’ve got it safe. And the ice-cream maker too!’

  Now there’s nothing you can do!

  I’ve got the ice cream, and Mum too!

  Revenge can only be complete,

  When only I have things to eat!

  ‘I was going to take you as well,’ the Greedle added conversationally. ‘But I think, oh yes, I really do think you are just too much trouble. The Best Ice Cream in the Universes at last! And all for me. Only me! Forever!’

  ‘Mum’ll never make ice cream for you!’ yelled Boo.

  ‘No? Well, we shall see. At least I have one oh-so-delicious vat of the Best Ice Cream in the Universes to eat while I persuade her. Oh, that will be so much fun! I do like … persuading … people. Now, is there anything else?’ The Greedle paused, as if it was thinking.

  Ah yes, there is just one thing more.

  Before I head out of your door …

  ‘What?’ panted Boo.

  ‘Woofy Christmas, little puppy!’ And the Greedle was gone.

  4

  Saved by Rat Surprise

  Spot arrived half an hour later, scampering up the stairs and sticking her nose around the door of the shop.

  Half an hour of standing, glued to the floor, desperate and terrified.

  Where had the Greedle taken Mum? How long was he go
ing to have to stand like this? Would the strawberry jam ever dissolve, or would he and the Bigpaws stay like this forever?

  ‘Boo?’ whispered Spot. Suddenly she howled. ‘Mummy! Dad!’

  She ran towards them, nudging them with her nose, then turned to Boo. ‘What’s wrong with you! Why can’t you move?’ she cried.

  ‘We’ve been strawberry-jammed,’ Boo whispered frantically. ‘There’s no time to explain now! Spot, hurry! You have to find a way to dissolve the jam.’

  Spot looked bewildered. ‘But how?’

  ‘Try water,’ said Boo desperately. ‘There are buckets under the sink. Hurry, Spot!’

  Spot nodded. She pushed open the cupboard door, grabbed the bucket handle in her mouth, stood up on her hind legs then nudged the tap on. She picked the bucket up in her mouth again, then stopped.

  Boo tried to control his impatience. ‘You can’t throw it in wolf form! You’ll have to Change.’

  Spot nodded. ‘Shut your eyes!’

  ‘This is no time to be modest —’ Boo began, then shut his eyes hurriedly. ‘They’re shut! Now hurry!’ At least Spot was good at Changing, he thought thankfully. She was the best Changer in the class. Not like him.

  There was a muffled sound from across the room. Then Spot’s voice said, ‘You can open your eyes now!’

  She was wearing one of Mum’s aprons to cover her embarrassing bits, Boo realised. Spot lifted the bucket and …

  ‘Urrrrkkk!’

  The water was cold, and wet, almost as bad as a (yeurgh!) bath. And it wasn’t going to work, thought Boo dismally, trying to lift his front paw. Of course something as simple as water wouldn’t dissolve the strawberry jam. Maybe nothing would ever dissolve it! Maybe he and the Bigpaws were stuck like this forever and …

  He tried to think. He HAD to think! What made jam come unstuck?

  And then he had it!

  ‘Essence of rat!’ he whispered hoarsely. ‘The big jar in the cupboard!’

  Mum made essence of rat by salting the fresh rats and leaving them till they melted into lovely stinky juice. It made the frozen Rat Surprises extra surprising. But essence of rat also dissolved everything if you used too much — even the mixing bowl.

  ‘Only one tablespoon to a bucket of water!’ he added hastily.

  Spot nodded. Boo watched her measure out the essence into another bucket of water. The familiar stench filled the room. It made him think of Mum, carefully adding a single drop to the Surprise mixture. Mum …

  ‘Are you sure you want to try this?’ asked Spot nervously, as the bucket began to bubble and turn purple.

  ‘Yes!’

  Spot threw the water over him.

  It wasn’t so bad this time. He was already wet, already cold. And suddenly …

  One toe wriggled. His paw lifted off the ground, and then another …

  ‘Free your parents!’ shouted Boo. He raced down the hallway and out the back door. Where had the Greedle gone with Mum? He was sure he could run faster than that flabby creature — even faster than the Zurm or the Roaches. He lifted his nose and sniffed. He was the best tracker in class, everybody said so!

  But there was nothing. No strange scent at all, except a lingering smell of popcorn and strawberry jam from the shop.

  They have to have left a scent trail! thought Boo frantically. He put his nose to the icy ground and sniffed all over. A faint scent of flying-pig droppings, an even fainter scent of flowers under the snow, waiting to come to life. Up in the empty sky the stars twinkled like hundreds and thousands on an ice-cream cone.

  But there was no scent of the Greedle. No scent of Zurm, or strawberry jam either. No vampire cockroaches.

  There was no scent or sign of Mum at all.

  It was impossible, thought Boo. Everything left some scent trail behind! And he knew his mum’s smell as well as he did the scent of his own bum! Suddenly he remembered that horrid, gentle voice. ‘The most powerful creature in the universes’, the Greedle had said.

  Maybe the most powerful creature in the universes could vanish! It had come out of nowhere. Maybe it had disappeared there too!

  It was impossible, he thought. Things like that didn’t just happen.

  But then horrors didn’t suddenly appear in ice-cream shops either, and carry away your mum.

  If only he hadn’t been so stupid! If only he’d kept threatening to widdle in the ice cream until the Greedle freed Mum and the Bigpaws. He was dumb! Dumb! Dumb! Just a cute little puppy, like the Greedle had said! Useless!

  He’d never see Mum again.

  Boo sat on the icy ground. He lifted up his nose, and howled.

  5

  The Werewolf General

  ‘Boo?’

  Boo turned. It was Mr Bigpaws. The big wolf looked dazed. His wet fur clung to his body. He shivered in the cold night air.

  ‘I … I’m sorry —’ Boo began.

  ‘It’s not your fault,’ said Mr Bigpaws hoarsely.

  ‘But it is! That thing was after our ice cream! If Mum and I hadn’t made the Best Ice Cream in the Universes the Greedle would never have come here.’

  ‘Boo, that thing was evil! No one else is responsible for what evil things do to other people. Besides, you saved us all! We’d all have died, glued up, frozen and starving, without you.’

  Boo choked back a sob. ‘I tried to smell where it’s taken Mum. But they’ve just gone! Vanished!’

  ‘We’ll do everything we can to track them down,’ promised Mr Bigpaws. ‘Every wolf in Sleepy Whiskers will be out sniffing the ground tonight. We’re putting out a Howl too. A Hero should be here soon to take charge of everything. The Hero will know what to do.’ The big wolf hesitated. ‘But, Boo — I’ve heard of evil creatures like that before. The rumours say they don’t come like normal people, on paws or feet or tortoise trains. They say they can travel between the universes …’

  ‘The Greedle said it was the most powerful creature in the universes,’ whispered Boo. ‘I … I didn’t even think other universes really existed!’

  Mr Bigpaws nodded. ‘I’m sorry, Boo. We may never find your mother. Don’t give up yet,’ he added hurriedly. ‘Maybe the Hero will know some way to find your mum, even if she’s been taken to another universe.’ Even as the Mayor spoke Boo heard the Howl go out from the hill behind the town, a cry from werewolf to werewolf that would travel across the world.

  Suddenly Boo couldn’t handle any more. He crouched down and put his paws over his nose. ‘I failed. I failed Mum …’ His voice died away.

  ‘You didn’t fail,’ said Mr Bigpaws. Boo peered up through his paws. There were tears on the big wolf’s face. ‘I’ve never seen anyone as brave as you, Boo. You saved us all.’

  Boo shook his head. He couldn’t speak.

  ‘Come on, Boojum, boy,’ said Mr Bigpaws gently. ‘You can’t stay here.’

  ‘Yes I can!’

  ‘All right, you can. I think you can handle anything, Boo.’ Boo was shocked to hear genuine admiration in the Mayor’s voice. ‘But you shouldn’t have to stay here. Werewolves stick together. Please, Boo. Come home with us.’

  Boo whined. But what choice did he have? He was too tired to think. Too cold, too scared to even try to think. Boo got to his feet and limped after Mr Bigpaws.

  The Bigpaws’ house smelt of chewed bones and old rugs and puppies who weren’t quite house-trained. One side looked out onto the park, with the creek running through it and trees to lift your leg on and a wide flat oval to play Chase the Stick and Catch the Rat. The other side looked out onto the marketplace, with its Hot Rat stalls and the shops selling new collars or human pants or dresses. You could even see the Best Ice-Cream Shop in the Universes from here. Boo didn’t look that way often. It hurt too much.

  There had been no sign of Mum since Christmas Eve, two days ago. No smell of her either.

  It had been a strange Christmas, watching everyone being happy. The Bigpaws had been as tactful as they could. But how could there be a proper Christmas without Mum?
Without the smell of ice cream, and the rats hanging up to dry before they were turned into Surprises?

  But everyone was kind. Too kind, thought Boo, as he lay with his nose tucked into his bum on the big squashy sofa in the living room. He wished they’d yell at him, say the words that echoed in his head.

  Why didn’t you think, Boo? Demand that the Greedle free them all before it took the ice cream? Then Mum would be safe, and he’d be back home, and everything would be as it always had been, as it should be, warm and happy.

  ‘Boo?’ Mrs Bigpaws came into the room. ‘Someone to see you.’

  Boo lifted his head off his paws as old Ms Shaggy trotted in behind her. She was in werewolf form today. Her fur was as grey as her human hair.

  ‘How are you, Boo?’ Ms Shaggy dropped the package she was carrying and gave him a quick nuzzle.

  Boo wrinkled his nose. ‘All right.’

  ‘We’re all so proud of you. I brought you a chicken neck. I know how much you like my chicken necks.’

  ‘Thank you, Ms Shaggy.’

  ‘It’s been rotting in the garden for a whole week,’ added Ms Shaggy, a bit desperately. ‘I dug it up specially for you.’

  ‘Thank you, Ms Shaggy,’ said Boo again. He should feel something, he thought. But everything inside him was empty, as though the Greedle had taken all his warmth.

  ‘You know, we all care a lot about you, Boo,’ said Ms Shaggy. ‘And your mother, too. If there is ever anything I can do to help, anything at all, just give me a howl.’

  ‘Thank you, Ms Shaggy,’ Boo repeated.

  Ms Shaggy hesitated, as though she’d like to say more. But what was there to say?

  Boo watched her pad out of the room. His head drooped onto his paws again. He should be doing something, he knew. Hunting for the scent again. Searching for clues. But it was as though the Greedle had frozen half his life.

  How could things change so quickly? If only he could shut his eyes and then when he opened them again be back in the ice-cream shop. The vat would be churning a new batch of Crunchy Cockroach Supreme and …

  ‘Boo? You have another visitor.’